Mrs Mildew: "We have a lovely student body."
Moe: "Yeah, yours wouldn't be to bad, either, if you took off about 20 pounds!"
Moe: "Why can't a chicken lay a loaf of bread?"
Curly: "Cause she ain't got the crust!"
Moe: "Have you heard of a V 5?"
Larry: "What's that a new car?"
Moe: "No, it's an old sock!" (Moe slaps Larry in the face.)
Curly: "I had to quit working at the bakery."
Curly: "Oh I got sick of the dough and go on a loaf!"
Curly: "You told me to go to the red light, did you?"
Curly: "Well that red light was on the bus going to Boston."
Prof. Quackenbush: "If I gave you a dollar and your father gave you a dollar. How many dollars do you have?"
Larry: "One dollar."
Prof. Quackenbush: "You don't know your arithmetic."
Larry: "You don't know my father!"
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